Tuesday, November 30, 2010

More Iguana the Another White Meat

I got a call today for iguana meat.  I don't sell iguana meat.  I may have passed on an excellent entrepreneurial endeavor.  You can order frozen iguana for $50 plus a pound if you are a lunatic.  Here, they literally fall from the trees.  They are pretty tasty too.  If you live near D.C. you can get frozen iguana for about $10 a pound if you know somebody and $15 a pound if you don't.  So I may look into getting an iguana harvesting permit.  They are invasive you know.

What I didn't know was that many Central American's considered iguana "better than Viagra."  It supposedly cures about anything.  I know of a few Mexicans that get an iguana every now and then just to get lucky.  So iguana may be an aphrodisiac as well.  I have already turned down a few iguana fishing trips because some PITA types think they should be protected or something.  Well, if Alicia Silverstone wants to come down here and get naked to stop me, I may think about it.  Until then, I am thinking about starting Conch Republic Iguana Safaris.

With the current unemployment situation here in the Keys and being an unofficial member of the Marathon homeless community, I could hire a few guys to collect iguanas for frozen meat sales.  Selling the frozen meat is a problem since I would have to get all kinds of licenses and permits to do it legally.  As a safari guide I can whack them and send the meat home just like fish.  Hook and line iguana harvesting is about as exciting as it gets so it should be an adventure for most vacationers not affiliated with PITA.  I will have to get property owner permission for iguana hunt/fishing expeditions on private docks.  With any luck I can get a permit for the Key Deer sanctuary on Big Pine Key.  Hunting for iguana in the sanctuary can be real exciting when the Key Deer are in rut as a fat boy on Youtube found out.

Then again, shipping iguana meat without a license is a federal offense.  After checking out the Bureau of Prisons national menu, I could learn a new trade, get free health care and eat pretty good until the economy picks up again.  So if the money is right, I could start taking orders right away.

Fishing wise, everything is pretty normal.  The Spanish Mackerel in the Bay are off the hook right now.  Mangrove snapper are every where.  Muttons are more challenging, but good sized.  Sailfish are close and hungry.  Offshore has been closed for a while due to the wind, so no reports there. 

Marathon in the Florida Keys should be your next fishing vacation destination. Join us for charter fishing, fishing guide trips or our fishing 101 so you can fish on your own with better success.

Tight lines,

Capt. Dallas

1 comment:

  1. You can legally kill iguanas in the key's provided you do it in a human way not shoot to kill but a slow frozen death for personal consumption if that makes any sense.Capt Bobby Manske